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A modern twist on an old movie. Please excuse the campiness and enjoy!

Born to Be This Way

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Dec 22, 2011 at 10:30AM

CALI, SO LIBERATED

Cali exited the downtown studios of Model X; a premiere photography studio that performs photo shoots of talented young women for print ads for the likes of Vogue, Elle and Cosmo. The youthful and beautiful Ms. Logan had been hired by a boutique designer to don its new summer collection in a glossy photo campaign. Entitled Girl-Rageous, the campaign featured Cali posing as a giant woman in a miniature city. Looking ravishing in the latest swimwear, tank tops and shorts, Cali was literally the picture of perfection, standing high above model buildings and streets in the new glossy ads. Cali was on her way to becoming a big star.

As Cali stepped out of the studio’s offices, she couldn’t help but giggle at the comment the photographer said upon her exit; “Have fun as a giantess today. Your wishes will come true.” Cali had always enjoyed the part of playing a rampaging giantess in many an action-packed giantess videos, but dared not dream of being a giantess for real; the disappointment of reality was too great. “Hmmm, maybe the guy put something in my coffee between takes….it did taste weird,” Cali ruminated optimistically. “If only,” Cali thought.

Cali walked through the lobby of the building where the photography studio resided, the hot summer sun glaring down on her thick brown hair and dark green eyes through the lobby’s expansive art deco windows. The loud sounds of Las Palmas, a densely populated city of eight million, greeted Cali’s soft ears as she exited the office building. “Ugh…yuck…” Cali moaned as a sick feeling overcame her stomach; her muscles began to cramp amid the 85-degree temperature and the ear-splitting noises of the city. 

Cali anxiously purchased a bottle of water from the nearby street vendor, drenching her thirst while her body shook with tremors. As Cali stood on the sidewalk, the brown-haired beauty felt her clothes tighten, then rip as her eyes scanned the increasingly distant sidewalk below her. “Omigod! Holy Shit!” Cali screamed in nervous excitement. People all around stopped and stared as the normally petite Cali started growing taller. “MMMmmmmm….Yesss!” Cali gleamed through the transformation. Standing at 20 feet tall, many people near her stood in awe at her growth or were making their way to escape.

IF I KNEW BEING GIANT WAS THIS MUCH FUN….

As Cali grew, her feet caved in the sidewalk, toes crushing a mailbox and her arms and hands crashing into the adjacent building, busting out windows and knocking bricks and other debris to the ground. Screams, cries and car crashes could be heard as the city folk beheld the giant Cali. Her expanding feet and toes, painted in a deep dark red had crushed several people and caused several cars to crash. The blood of her first victims eerily matched her toenail color.

OH! MY! GOD! Cali gasped as a now supersized, bodacious and lanky 150- foot woman. Cali stood on 23rd Street, in her birthday suit smiling, giggling and cutely waving down to the burgeoning mayhem below, soft, silky skin glowing gorgeously. OOOPSY, WATCH OUT! PEOPLE! OMIGOD! Cali’s wide green eyes feasted on a ten- car pile-up in which one car, clipped her neatly polished toe nail, flipped over and careened into an oncoming dump truck, causing chain-reaction crash. THIS ROCKS! Cali knelt down, her cute bare bottom just above the sidewalk, her long brown hair dangling on the wreckage as she peered into and among the mangled cars and trucks. People screamed as her big beautiful eyes and long hair dwarfed the puny bodies trapped in vehicles. THAT WAS SOOOOO ENTERTAINING! Cali giggled to the tiny people in the wrecked cars. THAT WAS A CAR CRASH WORTHY OF A GIANTESS LIKE ME. Cali laughed as two cars caught fire. I LOVE BEING A GIANT!!

A cavalcade of police cars, ambulances and fire trucks making their way toward the accident scene made Cali’s mouth water.. OH! THIS WHOLE GIANT GIRL THING JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER! Cali stood to her full height, waving her massive locks in the wind, the city beginning to smell of her pretty aroma. HEY COPS! Cali cutely greeted down to the black and white cars, as some officers drew their guns. UM….I’M LIKE…… A GIANT….AND…UM….YOU’RE NOT…. Cali mocked girlishly as she held her hands on her hips. 

TRY TO SHOOT ME AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. Cali giggled and rolled her green eyes cutely. A silence fell over the awkward scene, now filled with almost 50 police cars and ten fire trucks laid out only 50 yards from Cali’s pretty toes. Only the occasional scream for help could be heard from the accident scene. OK, PEOPLE, I DON’T HAVE ALL DAY (pause)……AND I’M HUNGRY….as Cali’s cute banter went on, two police officers fired up at the behemoth beauty, leaving only small welts above her four foot wide belly button. It was rather cute bely button.

As the echoes of the gunshots faded, a renewed silence fell over the calamitous streetscape. UH, THAT ALL YOU GOT? the 150-ft Cali teased. Then, lightly, femininely, colossal Cali knelt down and picked up a car from the wreckage with her soft hand, tore off the door and plucked a screaming man from the car; MMMMM, YOU LOOK SO GOOD TO EAT, Cali oozed in sultry tones as hundreds of people all around stared in silence as the gargantuan gal dangled the panicked commuter between her lady fingers. Cali then looked down at the police. BON APPETITE’, Cali sighed as she bounced on her toes. The beautiful giant placed the screaming man on her wet tongue and chew. 

MMMMMMMM….SOOOOO… YUMMY….HEY PUNY PEOPLE, YOU SHOULD SO TRY SOME….IT’S TO DIE FOR. 

As Cali savored her snack, she tossed the man’s car into the air. YOU PEOPLE CAN HAVE THIS….I’M TOO TALL FOR IT. The car careened into the line of police cars, killing three officers and injuring ten more. THUD…THUD…THUD…As the police opened fire on the giant girl, Cali made her way toward Palm Avenue, casually stepping on cars and people as she saw fit, swinging her hips and strutting without a care. I LOVE IT! THE SENSATION OF PEOPLE POPPING UNDER MY FEET….JUST AS I IMAGINED……MMMMMM. Her bare body glowed heavenly in the morning sun, a sight to behold for thousands in Las Palmas. 

At Ms. Logan’s feet were thousands of people fleeing on sidewalks or attempting to drive away. With zero tolerance as a giantess for tiny traffic, Cali knelt down and began flipping over, crushing and throwing cars. OMIGOD! THIS IS TOO MUCH FUN! Cali watched as people crawled out of smashed cars with giant girl fingerprints and smudges on them, others unable to move and even laughed when she spotted a car hanging from a tree. HEY, PEEPS! DID YOU KNOW I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE GIANT!? Cali scanned 23rd Street and stepped on a couple fleeing on a motorcycle. SSCRrrUNCH! Cali lifted her foot in the air, the mix of flesh and steel dangled from her soft sole. EW! THEY’RE SO ROAD KILL! Cali jiggled her foot, spewing the giant girl victims around the city. Cali's heart skipped a bit in pleasure, watching as people tried to save two people crushed under a car she threw. MMMMMMMM, Cali moaned.

All around Cali were crumpled cars, dead bodies, cracked and blood-stained roadways and fleeing people in the distance. MMMMM, THE SOUNDS OF SCREAMING PUNY PEOPLE…IT’S LIKE MUSIC TO MY EARS. Cali was so in her zone.

P-U!

Then something caught her eyes that made her laugh; two sanitation trucks sat just in front of her toes. As hundreds if not thousands of people exited cars, trucks and ran like mice for cover, the giantess picked up one of the sewage trucks. P…U! Cali gagged while she giggled. THINGS MIGHT GET A LITTLE MESSY AROUND HERE….At that moment, ten police helicopters appeared above the calamitous Cali, circling in a frenzy of wind and noise. “Ms. Logan, you are under arrest!” Holding the sewage truck in one hand, Cali raised the other open hand to her glossy red lips and blew a kiss at one of the choppers. The powerful girl watched as the helicopter lost control, veering lower to the ground; Cali stood on her toes, reaching for the doomed chopper. GOTCHA! Holding a truck in one hand and the chopper in the other, Cali threw the helicopter at a nearby building, an explosion ensuing as glass, concrete and office furniture plummeted onto the mass of fleeing humanity on the crowded streets. People were crushed and killed by Cali’s whimsical volley.

WHOA! THAT WAS AWESOME! Cali beamed. NOW FOR SOME FUN WITH THIS STINKY SEWAGE TRUCK, Cali boasted, pinching her nose comically, as the police circled above in their vulnerable choppers.

Attack of the 50' Woman w/Eileen Peoples: Chapter 4: BIG NIGHT

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Jul 3, 2008 at 9:59AM

"And here she comes, ladies and gentlemen. The one. The only. Ms.
Eileen Peoples, heading this way down the Red Carpet wearing a
rather daring, dark and glamorous Galliano dress. Eileen Peoples
sidled up next to her long time acquaintance Maria Menendez of
CelebTV. "So, Eileen, this afternoon is the premiere of your big…I
mean, really big movie. How does it feel to be starring in your
first feature film? Really a creature feature isn't it?" Maria
asked gleefully, her skin glowing for the cameras. Eileen smiled
confidently. "I'm so happy all my peeps are here and back at my pad
watching the premiere at a little pool party. It's been a long time
coming and I have a lot of people to thank," Eily responded.

Maria was flush with glee. "Your dress tonight is very gorgeous; made
special for this evening?" Maria asked. "Yep, it's heavily
influenced by my idol Aaliyah, dark but elegant." Eileen wore a
sleek dress with a low back and exposed shoulders and a gold
ornamental chain around her neck. Dark eye shadow gave her the
subtle hint of vampire, reminiscent of one of Aaliyah's last
movies. Paying a tribute to more contemporary times, Eily had on a
dash of Gwen Stefani's L.A.M.B. perfume.

But, what the pretty scent could not cover was the sting in the air from
the rumors and innuendo swirling around that sex tape on the internet.
Eily was all smiles on the red carpet this afternoon, however, not
because of the premiere, but because she was confident she would
overcome the Youtube Sex Scandal, as it had become known in the tabs.
Eily smiled wide at the adoring fans lined along Star Avenue leading into
Cinemaville's Ambrosio Theater. Lights and signs laced the theater,
announcing "Attack of the 50 Ft Woman," with oversized posters
featuring the beautiful star standing high above city streets. Her
sister, Shayana, escorted Eily as they made their way toward the
entrance.

Shayana gently poked Eily, cueing her to make a dash inside a
refreshment tent just to the right of the door, disappearing form TV
reporters and photogs along the carpet. Security guards and
paparazzi were all too honored to meet them under the fan-cooled
tent, somewhat of a surprise visit.

CRIB

"Hey, Mia, can you pass me some caviar?" T Payne asked the 20-yr old
pop singer as she stood at the edge of the pool at Eily's pad. "So
what's the big surprise?" Vanessa Hudgens asked as she floated on a
raft. "Just watch the TV," actress Paili von Penda, in a designer
bikini soothed the hot new star, giving the impression she was "in
the know" about something stirring. The plasma screen rested on a
wall just off the side of the pool, overlooking some 15 exclusive
guests for the closed circuit viewing of Eily's premiere. Alcohol
and a king's supply of sushi, lobster and other trendy foods helped
to pamper the routinely spoiled stars swimming and lounging at this
palatial pad in the Cinemaville Hills.

"Oh my god! See that?" T Payne laughed. All the people in attendance
at the party, both in the pool and out, froze in place. By this
time, most were barely in bathing suits, but all stopped eating,
drinking and whatever else they were doing to each other to watch
the 64" screen.

"What's going on?!@?," a woman screamed in the hospitality tent at the
premiere. The tent began to rip apart as the ropes securing it
snapped, whipping the bolts that held them in place soaring into the
sky. A sudden rush of people exiting from the rising tarp followed
loud crashes, banging and commotion. "Omigod! Run!" rippled through
the air with a blood-curdling howl. People on the street were
confused and stunned as they saw a white tarp swell toward the heavens,
taking on human form. They could not unglue their eyes from the
spectacle. The tent now completely unhinged and looking like nothing
more than bed sheets stood as lofty as the Statue of Liberty, the bottommost
portion giving way to a vast and towering pair of human legs.

More people in close proximity darted in dread.

Then the menacing transformation stopped, the crowds and traffic grew quiet,
staring up at the behemoth. Back at the house, guests' jaws dropped
and only the sounds making rounds were those of the light ripples of
the pool. Suddenly, two Godzilla-sized human arms appeared from under the
white cloth, slowly removing, crumpling and lifting the smothering
cover from the rest of the being that lay beneath it. Even more people from
surrounding blocks and buildings gathered around at the theater as
word spread that something odd, mysterious, yet too interesting to miss, was
taking place. Paparazzi and everyday fans snapped pictures high up
at the figure as a low rumble of voices wondered aloud and cell phones dialed out to the rest
of the world to report the historic event to friends and family.

Then, a flurry of camera flashes lit up the scene like opening
kickoff at the Super Bowl. The massive white sheet fell to the
ground, several people trapped underneath struggling to escape the
smothering threads.

Gasps of "OMFG!" "Wow!" filled the atmosphere from the crowds swelling in
the streets and on sidewalks. A transformed Eileen stood towering above
the carpet of people and vehicles on Star Avenue. Silence ruled the
moment as the enormity of the situation registered with everyone
around. Eileen smiled, lightly rolling her head to adjust her long
flowing dark hair. So taken was the swarm of people by the young actress'
height, they failed to notice Eily's designer duds, which
consisted of a shiny gray halter top and a matching mini-skirt designed for her
by Harajuku Lovers Collection and five-foot stiletto heels.

The stunner stared down at the milling crowd, paparazzi still
snapping but at increasing distances. TV cameras rolled as a light
warm breeze filled the orange-colored sky as 3PM rolled around.
Back at Eily's house, guests were wide-eyed in amazement, all in
attendance coming closer to the ample TV screen to marvel at the new
Eileen Peoples.

Eileen was beside herself with anticipation, trying to make sense of how to proceed.
She looked all around, the two- and three-story buildings under her;
palm trees, traffic-lined streets and milling crowds were but playthings
at her feet. Striking a relaxed front with a hand at her hips,
Eileen offered a confident “HI” down to fans, press and passers by
alike, waving her free hand. With heels, Eileen was now 55 feet tall and ready to
tour her new world. Behind Star Avenue, Eileen could make out a sprawling parking lot,
with many of the less courageous onlookers exiting the scene in their cars, a line
out of the parking lot already forming. Eileen smiled in their direction, finding the circumstances amusing.

NOW WHO'S GONNA TELL ME WHO PUT THAT RAUNCHY SEX TAPE ON YOUTUBE?

Eileen smoothly but menacingly interrogated hundreds in the proximity of
the twenty-something, terrorizingly tall Tinsel Town titan; a sure
sign she was not over that scandal by a long shot.

A short palm tree just below her knees seemed to beckon to be uprooted by the gargantuan starlet.
As the imposing woman grasped its branches with her right hand, ripping it from
the ground, its roots roared from under the sidewalk; Concrete crumbled and cracked
appallingly. Mystified mobs scurried in mayhem in all directions in fear of
where the displaced tree might finds itself next. Eileen held it in her hand
above the street, repeating her call for answers as she watched the colorful
haphazard pattern of people scattering before her.

Back at the house party, some people huffed in shock, but this gathering
of young beautiful people, all close friends of Eileen, were for the
most part thoroughly impressed, as exemplified by Vanessa
Hudgens’ sentiments; "Wow, I've got to get what she's got! Forget High School
Musical 4!" the impressionable 19-year old exclaimed as she wallowed
in contentment on her pool raft, fancy cocktail in hand.

Attack of the 50' Woman w/Eileen Peoples: Chapter 4: DEAR EILY....

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Jun 6, 2008 at 5:57AM

Champagne flukes, sushi, and the finest wines graced the ritzy digs of this mega-mansion in the exclusive hills of Cinemaville. Joints were brazenly dished out on silver platters. The movie industries hottest young stars, including Hillary Duff, Leighton Meester and recent Vogue cover girl Renee Yrilkosminov could be seen dining and skinny dipping on the palatial grounds of the estate.

A well earned rest was long overdue for the white-hot Eileen Peoples, who graced the current issue of 'People'. “Attack of the 50’ Woman was due to open, with largely excellent reviews and a blowout party was just the thing Eileen was hankering for .“Hey, pass some of that cocktail,” Eileen requested from the glimmering pool. “Sure thing, Eily” Hillary Duff said as she knelt down to hand off the glass to Eileen as she lounged on a luxurious pool raft. “I can’t believe how kickass this party is,” Eileen slurred with a champagne buzz. Just a few feet away, co-stars in the summer's hottest movie, Brian Dawdson and actress Bridgette Bethany were lip-locking on a lounge chair.

“Eily, what’s the premiere supposed to be like for this move?” her friend Stacy asked as she rested her chin on Eily’s raft. “It should be pretty cool. They’ve brought in a 50-foot replica of me and they’ll be putting it in the middle of Cinema Avenue, directly in front of the huge Loews Theater. Limos’ll drive right under me.”

Just then, Eily’s publicist strutted out poolside with a wide smile.

“Hey, Trish, what’s up? It’s time to stop doing work and come party with us,” Eily offered.

“I’ve got something better. Much better!,” Trish rang out spastically as she held a crisp white piece of paper in her hand. Trish scanned the document, reading its contents aloud:

Dear Ms. Peoples,

Congratulations on the completion of your new movie, 'Attack of the 50’ Woman'. I am sure that this film will be one of many great successes that will grace your career over the years to come and I and my colleagues at HomTech, Inc. will be rooting for you all the way. It is my understanding that the premiere of your film will be taking place soon and that you and your representatives are hard at work to make it a very special occasion.

I would like to assist you in making your premiere worthy of your talent and hard work.
While not yet public information, HomTech is diligently putting the final elements together on a drug that will aid people inflicted with growth-related disorders; simply put, one or two controlled doses will allow people to grow to normal height within a few days who ordinarily might have been stunted due to disease. The drug is an incredible development for millions. Moreover, the FDA has put approval on the fast-track.

For your premiere, our team can create a safe dosage capable of producing growth to the height of at least 50’ as well as an antidote that you can take to counter the effects after the event. I and my team assure you any drugs you take are safe and very effective. We can be on-site to supervise.

I have sent a copy of this letter to your agent as well as your production company. Mr. Jones of P Productions, Inc. has already given his approval via fax. HomTech is eagerly awaiting your reply. I am hoping we can work together.

Should you have any questions, feel free to call me at the number at the bottom of this letter. Again, congratulations and best wishes.

All the Best!

Dr. Jennifer Uytson
HomTech, Inc.

“So? What do you think?” Trish cried out with glee.

“Come on, do it. It’ll be awesome! How cool would that be?,” Stacy, Hillary, Brian and a cast of others cheered on.

“I’m pretty sure I can get one of the top designers to fit you,” Trish assured.

“Hmmm. Wow! Let me see,” Eily pondered as she took a sip of her cocktail. Model Dwayne Detton massaged her shoulders as he waded in the pool behind her. “Give me two minutes to think it over,” Eily purred as she revelled in her massage.

ATTACK OF THE 50' WOMAN: A CHAT WITH EILEEN

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Jun 6, 2008 at 5:33AM

POWER TO THE PEOPLES

A Daughter of Bollywood Takes Hollywood by Storm

With a burgeoning film career accented with the recent success of the hit romcom, Truth Be Told, Eileen Peoples is making waves while turning heads. The daughter of Bollywood actress Prisha Pellashanda, Ms. Peoples is finding fame and recognition here in America independent of her mother’s weighty success back in India. She has an Emmy to prove it.

People Magazine sat down with the 22-year old starlet a few hours before this year’s SAG Awards to get know this ravaging beauty that people closest to her refer to her as Eily.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN LIVING IN AMERICA?

My mother took me to Hollywood when I was 15 to try me out for a small part in a soap opera. She was in the middle of promoting a new film at the time, so the timing was, ya know, pretty good. She lived in America for a few years before I was born, so she had some connections. I didn’t get the part, but Elite Models got me some work in some catalogs and things. A one-week trip to the states and we were hooked. I’ve barely been back to India in the seven years we’ve been here.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR FATHER?

It’s been a couple of years. Not since he retired from baseball. It’s kinda sad, but I’ve moved on.

WITH STARS LIKE HALLE BERRY, DO YOU THINK FILMMAKERS ARE MORE OPEN TO WOMEN OF VARYING NATIONAL ORIGINS AND RACE?

Yeah [Laughs]. Just look at me. I’m the poster child; I mean I’m half Indian, half African American. I’ve been very fortunate that Hollywood has been very open to my taking on roles that many white actresses would die for. My calendar is booked.

OK, THIS BRINGS UP THE NEXT QUESTION. YOU’RE WORKING ON THE REMAKE OF ATTACK OF THE 50’ WOMAN. WHAT’S THAT LIKE?

It’s gonna be awesome. I watched the two originals [cringes] and they were pretty bad. I can honestly say this is up there with Godzilla or King Kong. Script is great and so are the special effects. Me and the crew are having a blast.

WHAT DOES THE SCRIPT CALL FOR YOUR CHARACTER TO DO?

Ummm, can’t quite tell. Let’s just say that if I were living in Metro City, be afraid, very afraid. There are some rather romantic scenes, um, and, no, no real people were actually eaten during the making of the movie, though [laughs].

ANY TRUTH TO THE RUMORS YOU’RE DATING…?

Not going there.

Attack of the 50' Woman w/Eileen Peoples: Chapter 3: PROMO

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Jun 6, 2008 at 5:29AM

Oh!.....My!....God! It’s a giant woman invading the city! She’s picking those cars up like toys and people are scattering like ants! Giant toes have trapped people in their grip and five-foot long fingernails have scraped lamp posts from their roots. There’s no escape from this colossal woman straddling the Metro City Overpass & Bridge.

Actually this scary-real photo of Patricia Piper (Eileen Peoples) in the new movie Attack of the 50’ Woman will be plastered on billboards and posters everywhere starting next week as the vast ad campaign for the Peoples-featured film kicks off.

“We spared no expense in making this photo and the movie as real as possible. You’d think an actual giant woman has just been spotted on the highway,” said Heather Hughes of Magic Arts Film Studios. “We actually closed down the Metro City Bridge, brought in some 50 cars and trucks and hired 100 extras to act like Eileen’s character, Patricia Piper were really toying with them high above, having grown to 50’,….or more (laughing). Then, back at the photo studio, we super-imposed a very sexy Peoples onto the scene, resulting in a freaky cool giant woman. It was inportant to convey the chaos and fear she inspires in this role”

Eileen noted lightheartedly that “..the art director had me try on all kinds of duds, but we settled on this cargo miniskirt and tight off-the-shoulder top for the bridge shoot. Even my hair manages to destroy a few cars, since as you can [see] from the poster, I'm primping and dragging my extra-long hair on the bridge. My stylist was the tops since Patricia had to look her best as she scared the crap out of people.”

Girlfriend Magazine spent the day with Eileen Peoples as she wrapped filming in her biggest role ever. The highlight of the day was the promotional poster shoot. When asked what she enjoyed most about this role, Ms. Peoples said “The director and crew are so skilled they had me convinced I was really a giant woman, ya know it really helped me bring Patricia Piper to life.” And as far as that wardrobe? “Yeah, designer Marcy Felstrom really hooked me up. I mean, my character’s wearing some hot mini skirts and sexy tops. Even designed them extra, extra, extra large!” Eileen giggled.

Attack of the 50’ Woman opens in December. The film reportedly cost $200 million to produce.

ATTACK OF THE 50' WOMAN w/Eileen Peoples: FUNKY, FREAKY

Posted By Prisha_Pal on Jun 6, 2008 at 5:23AM

MONSTER SIGHTING

“Holy shit, what the f#@!”, Trisha screamed as she gazed out of the six-story window of her apartment on the trendy part of Cinemavile. The nightmarish pounding of Godzilla-like footsteps timed almost rhythmically was accompanied by seismic shaking that caused the chandeliers of her posh digs to sway gently. As Trish gazed below, the ugly blood curdling screams of helpless people filled the air like a thunder cloud intruding on a sunny day.

Trisha’s big blue eyes bulged in disbelief as she watched this creature chase a luxury SUV down Star Blvd and whimsically lift it from the ground as its wheels spun uselessly a seeming ten stories up in its grip. The poor people in the SUV were the lucky ones; left in the path of this sci-fi movie-come-to-life were five or six cars and trucks crushed into the roadway, flattened and in some cases pressed into the indented pavement. People on foot were not spared as the monster dropped the SUV onto a fleeing mob.

City folk at street-level were enveloped in a sensory vacuum. The thunderous approach of the monster caused people’s ears to pressurize; others too close to the creature’s feet went temporarily deaf. Giant sweaty feet left gigantic moisturized footprints in the street, a toe print mockingly pressed onto a half crushed car and as people gathered to help the injured passengers of the toyed-with SUV, several Good Samaritans were in awe at the tennis racket sized fingerprints emblazoned upon it like a bad paint job. Beads of sweat the size of golf balls were paved onto the city streets.

Two enormous strands of the monster’s hair strewn recklessly in the nearby intersection met two cars with disastrous results as the strands ensnared the vehicle’s axles, sending the cars spinning violently into opposing traffic as the monster watched.

GOD, BEING A GIANT IS SO DAMN AWESOME, Eileen remarked as she rolled her big brown eyes in ecstasy, wrecked cars at her painted toes. BY THE WAY, JUST HOW SEXY DOES THIS CALVIN KLEIN EUPORIA PERFUME SMELL ON ME?, Eileen asked mockingly down to several injured people lying in the street.

A YEAR EARLIER

Ring! Ring! “Hello?”, Eileen answered like a perky school girl. “Hey, ‘Leen”, Trish greeted the actress with girlish glee. “Hey, glad to hear from you. Uh, havin’ the best time here at the spa; Just gotta mud bath, pedicure and now I’m at the pool wearing this cute bikini I got at Fredericks of Hollywood…at $2,000 it better be cute. What’s up?,” Eileen inquired excitedly. “Just got a call from the studio and they have a part for you. I know you just wrapped on a film with some A-Listers and I’m working on getting you a supporting role with some of the same people, but….” “What is it?” Eileen asked as she prepared herself for disappointment.

“Well, it’s not exactly the romantic comedy you just shot, but it sounds very high profile. Well, it’s the lead role in the newest remake of the movie, get this, Attack of the 50’ Woman,” Trish finished with a cringe on her face. An awkward pause ensued. “Hello?” Trish asked over a quiet cell phone. Then laughter. “OK, let’s get this straight, you got me, Ms. girly girl, Ms. Got-to-the-spa weekly…and I might add Emmy-Award winning actress playing a giant woman? Are you crazy?” Trish smiled. “I felt the same way, but hear me out. The screenplay and storyline have been completely revamped and overhauled and it will be nothing like the first two. It’s actually an interesting story and your character gets to do some amazing things as the 50’ Woman. Most importantly, you and only you are the star. This is A-List material” Trish said with re-assurance.

Eileen let her guard down. “Alright, so who’s directing?” she asked. Trish was awash in excitement and anticipation. “Get this, the directing and special effects will be overseen by the directors of the Matrix movies. Isn’t that awesome!” Trish exclaimed. Eileen’s skepticism seemed to melt in the sun. “That does sound pretty awesome. When can you send me the script?” Eileen replied as she took a sip of her fruity cocktail and adjusted her designer sunglasses.

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